BLOG POST: Written November 21, 2011
Today I felt the
joys of being home. Yesterday I arrived back at the clinic before my
roommates (all clinic students) had come back from visiting in the
village. As they walked up, not expecting me, I experienced the most
intense sense of joy. They came running, telling me in Shan how
they'd missed me, and giving me many warms hugs.
Earlier today
finding the girls' dorm quiet, I decided to go find the other Farang
(foreigners) to see what they were up to. Unfortunately I could not
find them anywhere and felt the bittersweet twinge of realizing they
had gone off together without me. Yet I understood that was because
they all fully expected me to be socializing with my Shan friends, so
I walked back with only the slightest hint of loneliness.
Yet no sooner than
that thought of loneliness had entered my mind, suddenly girls were
pulling me toward the bonfire in front of the dorm, and I was being
fed sticky rice, smoked in bamboo, dipped in sweetened condensed
milk. Warmth spread all over body. The students then proceeded to
slow down their speech and do everything in their power to include me
in conversation.
How can I respond
with anything other than joy at the opportunity to live here, in a
place so very special to me? Everything about this life seeps deep
into my bones, and I find only resistance to the thought of ever
returning to my existence as it used to be. When I think of all that
I was once missing out on, I almost want to cry. How could I have so
completely not understood slowness? Or deep community? This is home,
and, right now, I have no desire to leave.
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